Pilot a Great Lakes Freighter in the Most Boring Video Game Ever

A new game is being released on December 15, just in time for Christmas, but Great Lakes Simulator will not make 2021's hottest gift list.

I'm all-in on Michigan and love video games as much as anyone else, but the action in this game is more listless than must-have list. A few quick facts: I grew up on Lake Michigan, owned a sailboat, and currently have a kayak- I love the water. I'm old enough to have played Pong at my grandparents' house, Atari 2600 with my middle-school friends, and owned a Colecovision and first-generation Nintendo. I don't game much anymore, but it's not because I can't keep up with the action, I just choose to devote my time to other things.

Some of today's games are lightning-fast and can be difficult to follow for more seasoned (read: "older") gamers. In fact, reactions and reflexes do slow down as we get older. Our brain's reaction time peaks at age 24. A 124-year-old could play Great Lakes Freighter as you are the captain of a massive freighter ship sailing the Great Lakes IN REAL TIME.

You've never felt as free as you do on the bow of a ship on Lake Superior. Sail past some of the most legendary locations on the lakes and use the lighthouses and range lights to guide you on your way.

Sure, it would be fascinating to travel through the Soo Locks in real-time and sail the waters where the Edmund Fitzgerald and so many other ships fell victim to the Great Lakes.  To captain a huge vessel that takes miles to make a course correction takes careful planning, but the Great Lakes are so...great. The massive scale has got to make this a slow burn. The Russian gaming page Ты в теме игры! has a walkthrough (sail through?) video below you can take a look at and see if you disagree. Maybe this is somehow as oddly soothing as the Minecraft music and I'm missing the boat.

Great Lakes Simulator is set for release on Steam at 6 am Pacific time, December 15, 2021.

Get our free mobile app